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活到48岁,才明白健康意味着什么。

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健康的时候,你压根不知道,身体好到底有什么用。直到生病,才会明白,那些平时感觉不到的,才是最重要的。

我看到一篇文章中提到有一个人的父亲经常说,你如何对待身体,就如何过一生。那些连自己身体都照顾不好的人,只会给别人添麻烦。所以,好好吃饭、好好睡觉、好好锻炼,是我们家常年的习惯。

以上这些道理直到 2021 年 5 月,我人生的第 48 个年头,我才彻底的感受到了。

我从小到大,因为身体瘦弱,体质差,没少生病(咳嗽感冒发烧) ,但都是些小病几乎很少住院。在这 48 年里,我和众多的 70 后中国人一样在成长的过程中快乐的和同学好友们一起读书上学,春游登山野餐,和自己的恋人度过美好学校的时光然后心碎分手,和相亲对象结婚生子,和同事们努力工作,这一切都平稳的运行了 47 年,到了人生的第 48 个年头,却突然发生了变化, 2021 年 5 月我突然病发(头晕头疼)入院,经查是头部恶性肿瘤(手术之前亲友们担心我心理防线崩溃都瞒着我病因)引起的。这期间我老婆,我妈妈还有我妹妹,推着我,楼上楼下去每一个检查的地方做检查。帮我跑所有的住院手续,而我整个人躺在床上,除了输液就是做检查,最可悲的是我们这个四线小城市还处理不了我这种病,还好我的表弟在郑州,我们的省会城市亚洲最大的医院郑大一附院任职,获悉我的情况后,立即要求我转院到他们那里,他已经提前安排想好了一切关节(住院手术)

我 5 月 19 号到达大一附院,经过在走廊加床上五天的等待,我 24 号做了手术(脑袋开了瓢,取出了里面的胶质瘤) ,可让我不能理解的是,只不过是头部开了个口

(切开头皮,切开头骨,切开脑膜) ,做了个手术,手术做都做完了,缝都缝好了,为什么下床走路的力气却没有了(也可能是下床走路的勇气没了),更让我没有想到的是:我的人生重新进入了让人喂饭的阶段。

由于手术后吸收热,然后又无名的发烧

(这个极有可能是手术后饮食不当引起的,手术后可千万别喜欢吃什么就吃什么) ,这期间遭受的痛苦使我有三次想早点结束生命离开这个世界。可是我可怜的 70 岁的妈妈严厉斥责了我这种想法,再加上周围亲友们不惜一切代价都要把我救治回来并对我这种放弃生命态度的怒斥,我只有继续抗争下去,无路可退。这期间发烧的时候,眼前出现幻像,浑身疼痛难忍,打了人生当中第一只止痛针,就像以前禁毒宣传中说的那样,止疼针基本类似毒品,整个人一天都觉得舒爽多了。

连自己身体都照顾不好的人,只会给别人添麻烦。我开始痛恨自己的这种状态。人生中我第一次判断出来此时此刻的自己就是一个毫无用处的废物(这之前我有的时候对自己没有清醒的认识) 。由于插着导尿管,我连那种撒尿的痛快都感受不到了(尿液直接通过插入我膀胱的管子流入了这管子另一头的塑料袋里)。我开始在床上痛哭流涕,你能想象吗?一个 48 岁头上包着纱布、小弟弟插着导尿管儿的老男人在病床上痛哭流涕。

这次病重使我有足够的时间躺在床上反思,为什么自己会得这样的病,所谓在天成象,在地成形,老天这是在垂象让我明白什么。所谓病者,过也,过,不当之处也。

在没病之前,我确实对身体的使用有些肆意妄为了,我无所顾忌的吃,喜欢吃甜食就各种甜的点心水果没有节制的吃,喜欢吃素就平常所有的食物都是以素为主,饮食失去平衡。被各种成瘾的娱乐(手机、电视)占用了运动时间,导致身体机能的退化。

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